Post by Elder Gohan on Oct 8, 2011 16:57:04 GMT -5
*Show Starts* WE ARE LIVE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERESHIRE! PRESENTING ALL THE VERY BEST IN SWC ACTION! WITH OUT FURTHER ADO LETS BEGIN! (Captain Carpentry enters the ring) Well it's been 3 days since the low blow by Snape, lets hear what he has to say... Captain: On Friday, I was attacked after my match by that freak Snape. I'm not going to let that go, I tried to play fair & shake hands but you decided to be a sneaky bastard. I want a match next sunday at the PPV that is if you're not a PUSSYHOLE! *Snape appears on titantron* Snape: Captain, it has come to my attention that you want to face me... well you have no idea what you are in for. Yes I will face you at the PPV. There you have it, Snape v Captain Carpentry at the next PPV!
First Match: The Stig vs Justin Bieber
(Both make entrances)
Oh god it's Justin Bieber, here to ruin all the fun... Anyways Stig charges at him, no tie up. Stig is stomping a mudhole into Bieber GO ON STIG now it's dropping an elbow onto Bieber. Bieber ought to mount an offense right now as he's whipped to the turnbuckle & it's charging & a boot to the face of The Stig and followed by a shoulder block hoping to get some momentum from the crowd but they are booing him madly. Bieber now back suplexes Stig who rolls out the ring who elbows Bieber in the gut & slams his head against the ring steps both men back in the ring, stig taking advantage with a huge powerslam & splash. Stig now ascends the top rope, he turns round & nails the biggest moonsault known to man. 1.2 KICKOUT BY BIEBER, STIG GETTING A LITTLE FRUSTRATED NOW, he scoops up Bieber dropping his knee onto his spine, Stig signalling for the Powerlap... POWERLAP CONNECTING 1.2.3! The Stig has a microphone *The Stig: ... (translated: Justin Bieber... No 1 Contender...) Stig has named Bieber as number one contender but how the bloody hell did we understand that, it doesn't speak!
Winner: The Stig
Tag Team: Non title match. Chuckle Brothers vs Mario Brothers
(both entrances, match bell yadda yadda yadda)
The action starts as Barry Chuckle & Mario start in the ring with a bit of chain wrestling as Luigi takes control, lifting Barry into the air and a military press drop, Luigi takes a moment to compose himself before locking a chinlock on Barry for several minutes, audience clapping & stomping for Barry to shake off Luigi & make a tag, he shakes off Luigi but couldn't make a tag as he recieves a facebuster for his effort, Luigi slowly saunters towards his corner to tag in Mario who immediately goes to work on Barry, using his larger frame to stop Barry from making a tag. Barry is getting dominated, maybe it was too early for the chuckles to hold tag gold WAIT A MINUTE BARRY ROLLS UNDER A CLOTHESLINE & MAKES THE TAG TO PAUL WHO IS ALL FIRED UP! Clothesline to Mario... Clothesline to Luigi, Paul Chuckle is all over Mario who hits the Chuckle-Driver on Mario. Barry enters the ring now... Paul lifts Mario's legs from the standing position aaaaannnndddd.... TO ME..... TO YOU CONNECTING! 1.2.3!
Luigi lifts Mario up. The Chuckles & Mario Bros shake hands & celebrate
Winner: Chuckle Brothers.
SWC Championship No.1 Contendership Hardcore match: Yoshimitsu vs Gabriel Logan
(you know by now)
Yoshimitsu immediately kicks things off with a kick to the face of Logan, 'Mitsu heads out the ring to get a steel chair and hits him full pelt across the face with it & doesn't even wait until he's standing to smack him again Logan this time rolls out the ring to get a chair of his own, both men with chairs now staring eachother down they both go towards eachother SMACK both chairs connecting with eachother. That was really fucking stupid, Logan the first to his feet this time he has a wheelie bin & puts 'Mitsu in it. He can't move! Logan taunting and measuring up like a boxer before hitting a flurry of punches while he dumps the ninja further down in the bin & slams the lid on his head shutting the bin. Logan grabs a chair & starts hitting the bin 1..2..3..4..5..6..7..8..9..10! 10 HITS! 'Mitsu must be dying from vibrations. But what has he done? Black powder to the face of Logan, temporarily blinded by the powdery substance. 'Mitsu ducks and emerges with a sledgehammer! Mitsu is trapped in the bin still but is managing to give chase by hopping in the bin swing connects & Logan falls out the ring. Will Yoshimitsu escape from the wheelie bin of death? Find out after the break.
*Intermission. PURCHASE YOUR SWC MERCHANDISE OUTSIDE OF THE ARENA, NEAR THE CAFÉ!
SWC IS LIVE IN THE USA NEXT WEEK, DONT MISS YOUR CHANCE TO SEE YOUR FAVOURITE SUPERSTARS LIKE: THE STIG, GABRIEL LOGAN, MARIO & LUIGI, THE CHUCKLE BROTHERS & MANY MORE + THE CHANCE TO MEET THEM AFTER THE SHOW!*
We are back with SWC, Yoshimitsu has managed to escaped the bin but is lying on his arse, after Logan lured him outside the ring & smacked him with a stop sign, Logan now stomping the ninja & dragging him backstage, Logan strangling 'Mitsu with wires before giving that up. Yoshimitsu elbows Logan in the gut before using a nearby crate on his head. Both superstars now in the supply room Logan hits a low blow, before searching a box of weapons... He's looking for a smaller weapon & he's got a.... A GIANT DILDO!! WHO THE HELL ORDERED A DILDO?!? Yoshimitsu rolls in midair... this means KANGAROO KICK, Logan hightails it. Yoshimitsu unaware picks up the dildo, both these men charging around backstage, where they run past other superstars, Osama bin Laden is facepalming, Borat is reminded of the hime he did a similar chase & Gun Jack is pounding his chest laughing. 'Mitsu catches up & SMACKS HIM WITH THE HUGE DILDO. Oh please let this be the finish please, 'Mitsu covers 1...2....3! OH MY GOD, THE WEIRDEST FINISH TO A MATCH IN WRESTLING HISTORY!
Winner: Yoshimitsu (via way of dildo. no seriously)
Main Event: Ronald McDonald vs Shrek
(Again both entrances, match bell)
Both men lock up, McDonald takes the early advantage by taking Shrek down, now McDonald pounds the sturdy back of Shrek realising that his back is sturdy continues pounding away until he falls to the ground, McDonald the current SWC champion continues to work on Shrek knowing that he just wont budge so McDonald needs a speed advantage, which he has & will use it but it's just not enough. Shrek with a samoan drop he approaches McDonald & jumps crashing that huge arse on McDonalds ribs, ouch that would have killed the average man, Shrek now starting to warm up standing over the clowns ribs bends down as if to sit on him but McDonald kicks him in the face before he makes it to his feet & facecrusher from behind both men down. 1...2...3...4....5....6....7....8 Both men make it up, McDonald ducks the ogres attack and... spinning wheel kick from McDonald who starts dancing & signals RAN RAN RUU!!! Shrek dazed, confused & on spaghetti legs McDonald sees blood... MCSLAM! Can he make a cover... 1...2....3! Ronald McDonald survives the onslaught of Shrek but the ogre's mad. McDonald hightails it outta there. Well all we know is that McDonald will face Yoshimitsu for the title at the PPV, but will Shrek or Logan interfere? Goodnight everybody!
This Sunday, check out the first SWC PPV *Name TBD*
First Match: The Stig vs Justin Bieber
(Both make entrances)
Oh god it's Justin Bieber, here to ruin all the fun... Anyways Stig charges at him, no tie up. Stig is stomping a mudhole into Bieber GO ON STIG now it's dropping an elbow onto Bieber. Bieber ought to mount an offense right now as he's whipped to the turnbuckle & it's charging & a boot to the face of The Stig and followed by a shoulder block hoping to get some momentum from the crowd but they are booing him madly. Bieber now back suplexes Stig who rolls out the ring who elbows Bieber in the gut & slams his head against the ring steps both men back in the ring, stig taking advantage with a huge powerslam & splash. Stig now ascends the top rope, he turns round & nails the biggest moonsault known to man. 1.2 KICKOUT BY BIEBER, STIG GETTING A LITTLE FRUSTRATED NOW, he scoops up Bieber dropping his knee onto his spine, Stig signalling for the Powerlap... POWERLAP CONNECTING 1.2.3! The Stig has a microphone *The Stig: ... (translated: Justin Bieber... No 1 Contender...) Stig has named Bieber as number one contender but how the bloody hell did we understand that, it doesn't speak!
Winner: The Stig
Tag Team: Non title match. Chuckle Brothers vs Mario Brothers
(both entrances, match bell yadda yadda yadda)
The action starts as Barry Chuckle & Mario start in the ring with a bit of chain wrestling as Luigi takes control, lifting Barry into the air and a military press drop, Luigi takes a moment to compose himself before locking a chinlock on Barry for several minutes, audience clapping & stomping for Barry to shake off Luigi & make a tag, he shakes off Luigi but couldn't make a tag as he recieves a facebuster for his effort, Luigi slowly saunters towards his corner to tag in Mario who immediately goes to work on Barry, using his larger frame to stop Barry from making a tag. Barry is getting dominated, maybe it was too early for the chuckles to hold tag gold WAIT A MINUTE BARRY ROLLS UNDER A CLOTHESLINE & MAKES THE TAG TO PAUL WHO IS ALL FIRED UP! Clothesline to Mario... Clothesline to Luigi, Paul Chuckle is all over Mario who hits the Chuckle-Driver on Mario. Barry enters the ring now... Paul lifts Mario's legs from the standing position aaaaannnndddd.... TO ME..... TO YOU CONNECTING! 1.2.3!
Luigi lifts Mario up. The Chuckles & Mario Bros shake hands & celebrate
Winner: Chuckle Brothers.
SWC Championship No.1 Contendership Hardcore match: Yoshimitsu vs Gabriel Logan
(you know by now)
Yoshimitsu immediately kicks things off with a kick to the face of Logan, 'Mitsu heads out the ring to get a steel chair and hits him full pelt across the face with it & doesn't even wait until he's standing to smack him again Logan this time rolls out the ring to get a chair of his own, both men with chairs now staring eachother down they both go towards eachother SMACK both chairs connecting with eachother. That was really fucking stupid, Logan the first to his feet this time he has a wheelie bin & puts 'Mitsu in it. He can't move! Logan taunting and measuring up like a boxer before hitting a flurry of punches while he dumps the ninja further down in the bin & slams the lid on his head shutting the bin. Logan grabs a chair & starts hitting the bin 1..2..3..4..5..6..7..8..9..10! 10 HITS! 'Mitsu must be dying from vibrations. But what has he done? Black powder to the face of Logan, temporarily blinded by the powdery substance. 'Mitsu ducks and emerges with a sledgehammer! Mitsu is trapped in the bin still but is managing to give chase by hopping in the bin swing connects & Logan falls out the ring. Will Yoshimitsu escape from the wheelie bin of death? Find out after the break.
*Intermission. PURCHASE YOUR SWC MERCHANDISE OUTSIDE OF THE ARENA, NEAR THE CAFÉ!
SWC IS LIVE IN THE USA NEXT WEEK, DONT MISS YOUR CHANCE TO SEE YOUR FAVOURITE SUPERSTARS LIKE: THE STIG, GABRIEL LOGAN, MARIO & LUIGI, THE CHUCKLE BROTHERS & MANY MORE + THE CHANCE TO MEET THEM AFTER THE SHOW!*
We are back with SWC, Yoshimitsu has managed to escaped the bin but is lying on his arse, after Logan lured him outside the ring & smacked him with a stop sign, Logan now stomping the ninja & dragging him backstage, Logan strangling 'Mitsu with wires before giving that up. Yoshimitsu elbows Logan in the gut before using a nearby crate on his head. Both superstars now in the supply room Logan hits a low blow, before searching a box of weapons... He's looking for a smaller weapon & he's got a.... A GIANT DILDO!! WHO THE HELL ORDERED A DILDO?!? Yoshimitsu rolls in midair... this means KANGAROO KICK, Logan hightails it. Yoshimitsu unaware picks up the dildo, both these men charging around backstage, where they run past other superstars, Osama bin Laden is facepalming, Borat is reminded of the hime he did a similar chase & Gun Jack is pounding his chest laughing. 'Mitsu catches up & SMACKS HIM WITH THE HUGE DILDO. Oh please let this be the finish please, 'Mitsu covers 1...2....3! OH MY GOD, THE WEIRDEST FINISH TO A MATCH IN WRESTLING HISTORY!
Winner: Yoshimitsu (via way of dildo. no seriously)
Main Event: Ronald McDonald vs Shrek
(Again both entrances, match bell)
Both men lock up, McDonald takes the early advantage by taking Shrek down, now McDonald pounds the sturdy back of Shrek realising that his back is sturdy continues pounding away until he falls to the ground, McDonald the current SWC champion continues to work on Shrek knowing that he just wont budge so McDonald needs a speed advantage, which he has & will use it but it's just not enough. Shrek with a samoan drop he approaches McDonald & jumps crashing that huge arse on McDonalds ribs, ouch that would have killed the average man, Shrek now starting to warm up standing over the clowns ribs bends down as if to sit on him but McDonald kicks him in the face before he makes it to his feet & facecrusher from behind both men down. 1...2...3...4....5....6....7....8 Both men make it up, McDonald ducks the ogres attack and... spinning wheel kick from McDonald who starts dancing & signals RAN RAN RUU!!! Shrek dazed, confused & on spaghetti legs McDonald sees blood... MCSLAM! Can he make a cover... 1...2....3! Ronald McDonald survives the onslaught of Shrek but the ogre's mad. McDonald hightails it outta there. Well all we know is that McDonald will face Yoshimitsu for the title at the PPV, but will Shrek or Logan interfere? Goodnight everybody!
This Sunday, check out the first SWC PPV *Name TBD*
