Post by Elder Gohan on Oct 10, 2011 14:35:11 GMT -5
"Welcome to the SWC Arena, bringing you all the best in SWC action! Be sure to tune in every week, if you don't you're an assbox!"
Match 1: Mario vs Osama Bin Laden
*match bell*
There's the bell & Mario goes in hard with a right hand straight to the jaw & Bin Laden throws a left, Mario with a right, Bin Laden with a left & an elbow knocking him off his stride & Bin Laden with a jawbreaker Mario bounces backwards while Osama taunts the crowd, meanwhile a submission applied to the head of Mario who tries to worm out, Osama who is being evil to poor Mario changes holds into a dragon sleeper, Mario eventually reverses the hold after a few minutes & northern lights suplex 1.2 kickout by Osama, Mario regroups in the corner, a moments breath for him then. Mario now takes charge of the matchup by kneecapping Bin Laden, rebounding off the ropes now and a huge knee drop using that momentum & the knee of course, Mario is choking the life from Bin Laden who is fading fast, reaching the rope eventually 1.2.3.4 lets go OOOF! what a kick to the face by Mario surely thats it! 1.2 NOO! OSAMA KICKS OUT! Elbow to Mario's gut who gets thrown into the corner Osama charges & runs into a boot & Mario shuffles up the top rope... MUSHROOM STOMP! MUSHROOM STOMP!! Surely Mario has to win here... Cover 1.2.3! HE DID IT, MARIO ACTUALLY WON A MATCH!! HELL YEAH HE DID IT!!!!
Winner: Mario(!)
Match 2: Louis Spence vs Homer Simpson
*match bell*
Homer tries a clothesline, Spence ducked it & rebound by Homer, ducked again! Homer tries a rebounded headbutt Spence jumps this time Homer rep unleashing eats, Spence jumps yet again. Homer becoming very tired in the opening minute goes for a left, Spence dodges with a fancy manuever, Homer eventually mounts an offense booting him in the head and elbow drop, before picking him up & powerbombing Spence to the canvas. Simpson is really angry, he looks pissed off & is unloading on the poor dancer... Simpson is crushing the throat of Spence, surely an illegal move? Oh well not like these referees are actually looking at the match... Simpson has suplexed the wind out of Spence and stands over the head of the dancer, snap kick by Spence who knows he's not going to mount any form of physical offense, tries the same sequence at the start of the match & completes it, what a superstar! Vicious martial arts kick to the face of Homer who's stumbled, Spence is unleashing all of his arsenal against Homer who eventually falls down. Spence is taking his time to do a dance routine at Homer's expense, the crowd love this but Homer creeps up behind him & drags him to the corner. Uh oh TURNBUCKLE ASS BUMP! 1.2.3! Unlucky Louis, you should have won but that arsehole Homer Simpson stole a fabulous victory
Winner: Homer Simpson
Promo for #1 Contendership battle royal
Gun Jack: To be a champion...
Borat: Is my destiny...
Justin Bieber: My life's work...
Chuckle Bros: Our moment...
Bond: I'll never get a better opportunity...
Rest of roster: We'll give it our all!
Match 3: The Stig vs Gun Jack non title match
*match bell*
There we go, Jack winding up his arms & punch. 1.2.3.4.5.6.7.8.9.10 TEN PUNCHES from Jack! Stig boots him in the gut, somehow Jack reacts to it Stig with a dropkick, Jack stumbles I don't think I've ever seen Jack dominated like this... Stig rebounds & Jack uppercuts the Stig. Jack ascends the top rope! I've never seen him do this before... MOONSAULT BY JACK! Ouch! Jack rolls & steamroller, come to think of it I've never seen Stig dominated like this either. Gun Jack tries a DIVE BOMBER! MISSED STIG ROLLS UP 1.2.3! Gun Jack's first Pinfall loss!
Winner: The Stig
Main Event: SWC Battle Royal for #1 Contendership
Rules
- 2 Superstars start in the ring
- Elimination from the top rope only
- Yoshimitsu is banned
*match bell*
Here we go who's the first superstar? #1 is... BORAT!! Now time for #2 he is... LUIGI!
These two start wrestling as Luigi takes advantage, locking up Borat in the corner trying to eliminate him already... Borat with a boot to the face that ends Luigi's attempt at elimination. Luigi chokes Borat with a sleeper hold, bringing him down to his knees. 10.9.8.7.6.5.4.3.2.1! #3 is... Severus Snape! Snape charges the ring and left hand to Luigi, right to Borat. EXPELLIARMUS to Luigi & again to Borat! Snape is on fire despite the heavy booing from the SWC zone. Snape is waiting, almost thinking his next step. Maybe he thinks that Gun Jack is next. We're about to find out anyway ..7.6.5.4.3.2.1! #4 is... Osama bin Laden! He slowly approaches the ring, enters & is eliminated straight away! Oh well another minute down another superstar. #5 is Krusty! Borat's rival, who storms the ring wanting to pound him & a fight A FIGHT! LEFT RIGHT LEFT! ELBOWS & PUNCHES! Luigi seperates them & tells them to get on with the match before he gets kicked in the balls by Krusty, Borat blindsides Krusty. #6 is on his way... Justin Bieber! Ughh for fuck sake I hate him, I think we should skip to #7 *skip, no eliminations* who is #7 it's... Bond! James Bond! Who saunters to the ring cooler than a breeze. Meanwhile in the ring it's all getting hectic, attempted eliminations & wrestling everywhere. Oh my... Luigi is gone, bye bye! #'s 8,9 & 10 will enter together & they are... Chuckle Brothers with the Stig they head into the ring just as Krusty gets eliminated by Borat. Time flies in these battle royals as #11 is Captain Carpentry who goes into the ring & eliminates Bond & Snape! A DOUBLE ELIMINATION AS SOON AS HE ENTERS THE RING! Incredible, the ring is full of superstars as Barry Chuckle is standing dangerously on the wrong side of the top rope... Paul Chuckle rebounds off the rope to clothesline Bieber, hits but BARRY CHUCKLE ELIMINATED! BY PAUL CHUCKLE! Paul Accidentally elbows Barry & he loses footing. #12 is... Shrek who comes in & SWAMP DROP ON BORAT, picked up & tossed out, Borat gone... More chaos in the ring as #13 comes in Peter Griffin, he comes in lasts 30 seconds & takes a dive... Eliminated himself. (Recap. Eliminated superstars: Bin Laden, Luigi, Krusty, Bond, Snape, Barry Chuckle, Borat, Griffin) #14 follows next.
Advert: FOLLOW ALL YOUR FAVOURITE SWC SUPERSTARS ONLINE AT THE DAWG HOUSE! ALSO GET YOUR OFFICIAL SWC MERCHANDISE AT THE SAME SITE!
We are back & Gun Jack is #14 who is on his own on one corner & everybody has stopped wrestling to think. They all grab hold of Jack & eliminate him, The Stig held on! What a muppet! anyway # 15 is... Darth Vader! he slow as ever is still walking to the ring... While Paul Chuckle gets thrown over the top rope, followed by Shrek & Justin Bieber! YES!! #16 is about to come out & Vader STILL hasn't made it to the ring. # 16 is Gabriel Logan! Who beats Vader to the ring walking. Minute of wrestling... #17 is Mario! Enters... Eliminated! #18,19,20 & 21 will enter together they are Louis Spence, Homer Simpson, Spider-Man & Niko Bellic 2 of those are eliminated with in minutes as Vader FINALLY makes into the ring & he gets eliminated by Spence. "NNOOOOOOOO!" (Elimination Recap: Bin Laden, Luigi, Krusty, Bond, Snape, Barry Chuckle, Borat, Griffin, Jack, Stig, Paul Chuckle, Shrek, Bieber, Mario, Simpson, Bellic, Vader.) FINAL FOUR TIME: SPIDER-MAN, GABRIEL LOGAN, CAPTAIN CARPENTRY & LOUIS SPENCE. Louis Spence now shoves Spider-Man into the ringpost, Captain runs at him. Flamboyant dodge as the captain is flung over the top rope, Spence starts to dance again... DAMNIT MATE, YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS, YOU'RE GONNA GET ELIMINATED IF YOU KEEP SHOWING OFF, Logan lays a hand on his shoulder Spence runs to the ropes allowing Spidey to hoist Spence over & Logan hoists Spidey over! *Match bell* WE HAVE A NEW NUMBER ONE CONTENDER HELL YEAH! RONALD MCDONALD VS GABRIEL LOGAN AT THE NEXT PPV!
Winner: Gabriel Logan (new #1 contender)
Match 1: Mario vs Osama Bin Laden
*match bell*
There's the bell & Mario goes in hard with a right hand straight to the jaw & Bin Laden throws a left, Mario with a right, Bin Laden with a left & an elbow knocking him off his stride & Bin Laden with a jawbreaker Mario bounces backwards while Osama taunts the crowd, meanwhile a submission applied to the head of Mario who tries to worm out, Osama who is being evil to poor Mario changes holds into a dragon sleeper, Mario eventually reverses the hold after a few minutes & northern lights suplex 1.2 kickout by Osama, Mario regroups in the corner, a moments breath for him then. Mario now takes charge of the matchup by kneecapping Bin Laden, rebounding off the ropes now and a huge knee drop using that momentum & the knee of course, Mario is choking the life from Bin Laden who is fading fast, reaching the rope eventually 1.2.3.4 lets go OOOF! what a kick to the face by Mario surely thats it! 1.2 NOO! OSAMA KICKS OUT! Elbow to Mario's gut who gets thrown into the corner Osama charges & runs into a boot & Mario shuffles up the top rope... MUSHROOM STOMP! MUSHROOM STOMP!! Surely Mario has to win here... Cover 1.2.3! HE DID IT, MARIO ACTUALLY WON A MATCH!! HELL YEAH HE DID IT!!!!
Winner: Mario(!)
Match 2: Louis Spence vs Homer Simpson
*match bell*
Homer tries a clothesline, Spence ducked it & rebound by Homer, ducked again! Homer tries a rebounded headbutt Spence jumps this time Homer rep unleashing eats, Spence jumps yet again. Homer becoming very tired in the opening minute goes for a left, Spence dodges with a fancy manuever, Homer eventually mounts an offense booting him in the head and elbow drop, before picking him up & powerbombing Spence to the canvas. Simpson is really angry, he looks pissed off & is unloading on the poor dancer... Simpson is crushing the throat of Spence, surely an illegal move? Oh well not like these referees are actually looking at the match... Simpson has suplexed the wind out of Spence and stands over the head of the dancer, snap kick by Spence who knows he's not going to mount any form of physical offense, tries the same sequence at the start of the match & completes it, what a superstar! Vicious martial arts kick to the face of Homer who's stumbled, Spence is unleashing all of his arsenal against Homer who eventually falls down. Spence is taking his time to do a dance routine at Homer's expense, the crowd love this but Homer creeps up behind him & drags him to the corner. Uh oh TURNBUCKLE ASS BUMP! 1.2.3! Unlucky Louis, you should have won but that arsehole Homer Simpson stole a fabulous victory
Winner: Homer Simpson
Promo for #1 Contendership battle royal
Gun Jack: To be a champion...
Borat: Is my destiny...
Justin Bieber: My life's work...
Chuckle Bros: Our moment...
Bond: I'll never get a better opportunity...
Rest of roster: We'll give it our all!
Match 3: The Stig vs Gun Jack non title match
*match bell*
There we go, Jack winding up his arms & punch. 1.2.3.4.5.6.7.8.9.10 TEN PUNCHES from Jack! Stig boots him in the gut, somehow Jack reacts to it Stig with a dropkick, Jack stumbles I don't think I've ever seen Jack dominated like this... Stig rebounds & Jack uppercuts the Stig. Jack ascends the top rope! I've never seen him do this before... MOONSAULT BY JACK! Ouch! Jack rolls & steamroller, come to think of it I've never seen Stig dominated like this either. Gun Jack tries a DIVE BOMBER! MISSED STIG ROLLS UP 1.2.3! Gun Jack's first Pinfall loss!
Winner: The Stig
Main Event: SWC Battle Royal for #1 Contendership
Rules
- 2 Superstars start in the ring
- Elimination from the top rope only
- Yoshimitsu is banned
*match bell*
Here we go who's the first superstar? #1 is... BORAT!! Now time for #2 he is... LUIGI!
These two start wrestling as Luigi takes advantage, locking up Borat in the corner trying to eliminate him already... Borat with a boot to the face that ends Luigi's attempt at elimination. Luigi chokes Borat with a sleeper hold, bringing him down to his knees. 10.9.8.7.6.5.4.3.2.1! #3 is... Severus Snape! Snape charges the ring and left hand to Luigi, right to Borat. EXPELLIARMUS to Luigi & again to Borat! Snape is on fire despite the heavy booing from the SWC zone. Snape is waiting, almost thinking his next step. Maybe he thinks that Gun Jack is next. We're about to find out anyway ..7.6.5.4.3.2.1! #4 is... Osama bin Laden! He slowly approaches the ring, enters & is eliminated straight away! Oh well another minute down another superstar. #5 is Krusty! Borat's rival, who storms the ring wanting to pound him & a fight A FIGHT! LEFT RIGHT LEFT! ELBOWS & PUNCHES! Luigi seperates them & tells them to get on with the match before he gets kicked in the balls by Krusty, Borat blindsides Krusty. #6 is on his way... Justin Bieber! Ughh for fuck sake I hate him, I think we should skip to #7 *skip, no eliminations* who is #7 it's... Bond! James Bond! Who saunters to the ring cooler than a breeze. Meanwhile in the ring it's all getting hectic, attempted eliminations & wrestling everywhere. Oh my... Luigi is gone, bye bye! #'s 8,9 & 10 will enter together & they are... Chuckle Brothers with the Stig they head into the ring just as Krusty gets eliminated by Borat. Time flies in these battle royals as #11 is Captain Carpentry who goes into the ring & eliminates Bond & Snape! A DOUBLE ELIMINATION AS SOON AS HE ENTERS THE RING! Incredible, the ring is full of superstars as Barry Chuckle is standing dangerously on the wrong side of the top rope... Paul Chuckle rebounds off the rope to clothesline Bieber, hits but BARRY CHUCKLE ELIMINATED! BY PAUL CHUCKLE! Paul Accidentally elbows Barry & he loses footing. #12 is... Shrek who comes in & SWAMP DROP ON BORAT, picked up & tossed out, Borat gone... More chaos in the ring as #13 comes in Peter Griffin, he comes in lasts 30 seconds & takes a dive... Eliminated himself. (Recap. Eliminated superstars: Bin Laden, Luigi, Krusty, Bond, Snape, Barry Chuckle, Borat, Griffin) #14 follows next.
Advert: FOLLOW ALL YOUR FAVOURITE SWC SUPERSTARS ONLINE AT THE DAWG HOUSE! ALSO GET YOUR OFFICIAL SWC MERCHANDISE AT THE SAME SITE!
We are back & Gun Jack is #14 who is on his own on one corner & everybody has stopped wrestling to think. They all grab hold of Jack & eliminate him, The Stig held on! What a muppet! anyway # 15 is... Darth Vader! he slow as ever is still walking to the ring... While Paul Chuckle gets thrown over the top rope, followed by Shrek & Justin Bieber! YES!! #16 is about to come out & Vader STILL hasn't made it to the ring. # 16 is Gabriel Logan! Who beats Vader to the ring walking. Minute of wrestling... #17 is Mario! Enters... Eliminated! #18,19,20 & 21 will enter together they are Louis Spence, Homer Simpson, Spider-Man & Niko Bellic 2 of those are eliminated with in minutes as Vader FINALLY makes into the ring & he gets eliminated by Spence. "NNOOOOOOOO!" (Elimination Recap: Bin Laden, Luigi, Krusty, Bond, Snape, Barry Chuckle, Borat, Griffin, Jack, Stig, Paul Chuckle, Shrek, Bieber, Mario, Simpson, Bellic, Vader.) FINAL FOUR TIME: SPIDER-MAN, GABRIEL LOGAN, CAPTAIN CARPENTRY & LOUIS SPENCE. Louis Spence now shoves Spider-Man into the ringpost, Captain runs at him. Flamboyant dodge as the captain is flung over the top rope, Spence starts to dance again... DAMNIT MATE, YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS, YOU'RE GONNA GET ELIMINATED IF YOU KEEP SHOWING OFF, Logan lays a hand on his shoulder Spence runs to the ropes allowing Spidey to hoist Spence over & Logan hoists Spidey over! *Match bell* WE HAVE A NEW NUMBER ONE CONTENDER HELL YEAH! RONALD MCDONALD VS GABRIEL LOGAN AT THE NEXT PPV!
Winner: Gabriel Logan (new #1 contender)
