Post by Elder Gohan on Dec 31, 2012 19:00:54 GMT -5
Ladies & Gentlemen. We now to live to the SWC Arena, where we have a guest performance from The Verve performing their classic, Bittersweet Symphony!
Many thanks to The Verve! Without further ado, the first award to be presented, the Best Match award. Please welcome... Former WWF Superstar... HARDCORE HOLLY!
Holly: "NOW YA'LL LISTEN HERE, THIS IS AN AWARD THAT MANY SUPERSTAR SHOULD HOPE TO WIN. THE CANDIDATES... CAPTAIN CARPENTRY VS JAMES MAY IC TITLE. KOKDOWN ELIMINATION CHAMBER. SLENDERMAN VS RONALD MCDONALD! HOOK UP MY DAMN MIC SO I DON'T HAVE TO SCREAM!... *Ahem* That's better, now the award for best match is... Slenderman & Ronald McDonald in a Buried Alive match!"
Slender: "..."
I'll assume that Slenderman is thankful for the award, Ronald McDonald is still lying in the ground somewhere. Onwards, we go to Jeremy Kyle who is still trying to get opinions from fans... Nope, comms have gone down. Anyway, we go now to the stage as the award for Worst Match is being presented. Please welcome to the stage, from the Hoenn region... Alan & Ralph!
Ralph: "Greetings SWC, I'm still kinda getting used to sort-of celebrity status!"
Alan: "Shut yer cakehole & give the award so I can order my pint at the after party!"
Ralph: "OK, my foul-mouthed fellow. This "award" goes to... Niko Bellic vs Spider-Man!"
Alan: "Come & get it Spidey, or it goes on eBay!"
Well it was nice seeing Alan & Ralph, but we now move on to Lady Gaga performing her 2011 hit Poker Face!
Anywho, it's half eleven which means more awards to be awarded! Funniest moment to be presented by a well known comedian. Katy Brand.
Katy: "*INSERT SHIT JOKE HERE FOLLOWED BY A CRAP ACCENT*"
Present the award already you cow!
Katy: "Ugh... Metalgod!"
Metalfuck: "thx fags lol u suck the nuts!"
*The boos ring out*
Oh my, lets go live to Jeremy Kyle. Jeremy...
Jeremy: "Well, that backfired. Funniest moment, not funny at all. Anyway, I must be on stage alongside Neil Lennon to present the best superstar award."
He said it.
Neil: "I would like to take this opportunity to thank all of the SWC fans who sounded their appreciation for mine & Jeremy's hard work creating superstars & hope that you continue the support."
Jeremy: "I would also echo Mr Lennon's statement tonight, but time is against us. The award for best superstar goes to... George!"
George: "I knew I would win, I mean I'm amazingly dressed, talented & I of course saved the company! But yeah thanks, I won superstar of the year, of course I knew I would!"
Cor blimey, he loves himself! Worst superstar presented by oh, it's me!
Me: "Ladies & Gentlemen, we have at times shared joy, excitement, laughter, even at times our frustration, anger. But this award is the ultimate indignation, whoever gets this you may, feel free to laugh. The winner is... Darth Vader!"
*Vader too embarrassed to come up*
Me: "Come on Vader, try not to shit yourself, renting the hall cost ages!"
Turns out I'm presenting most of the awards, well the next one at least.
Me: "I'm keeping this one quick. Debut of the year... James May! May you continue your amazing career."
May: "Cheers lads!... And um, ladettes!"
Crap Impact of the year (even presented with a crap impact)
Here's a hobo of the street to chuck it at the winner... METALFUCK CATCH!
Here's George to present the award for best dressed, I'll assume he wins...
George: "Hell, you may as well give this one to me... The winner is... Stacey Lacey?!? SHE DOESN'T EVEN WEAR CLOTHES, WELL SHE RARELY DOES! THIS IS RIGGED!"
& of course, the worst dressed award, presented by Martin, the work experience lad, he is completely bad at fashion, even I'm better...
Martin: "Gee, this award goes to... Mumford!"
Mumford: "I NOT LIKE THIS AWARD, IT'S SMELLY & HORRIBLE, I WANTED A BETTER GOLD ONE SHAPED LIKE A HAT WOOOO!"
As long as he doesn't wear it...
We bring you now, to the final award. The "Unbelievable, Jeff! Award for most shocking, presented by Jeff Stelling & Kris Kamara..."
Jeff: "There has been a decision... Who has it gone to Kammy?"
Kamara: "UNBELIEVABLE JEFF! It... Hasn't been decided yet! No wait it has Jeff it's... Ronald McDonald's heel turn! UNBELIEVABLE JEFF!"
Jeff: "Typical Kammy, feeling jovial under pressure. That concludes SWC Award ceremony. Thanks for watching, happy new year."
It's nearly 2013, infact 8 minutes. We'll just run a generic slideshow of the past year. This will conclude SWC for tonight & infact the year, see you in 2013!
*highlight reel & all involved with SWC on the stage applauding. Backstage, office workers, event security & of course the superstars all receiving their rounds of applause (except Metalfuck)*
5 minutes to go. We are not wasting a once in a lifetime shot of all of SWC on the stage at midnight. Speaking of which, I better get up there!
OMG 30 SECONDS!
WE'RE IN 2013~! THE PERFECT GROUP SHOT OF ALL OF SWC ON THE STAGE! Right, back to work then?
Many thanks to The Verve! Without further ado, the first award to be presented, the Best Match award. Please welcome... Former WWF Superstar... HARDCORE HOLLY!
Holly: "NOW YA'LL LISTEN HERE, THIS IS AN AWARD THAT MANY SUPERSTAR SHOULD HOPE TO WIN. THE CANDIDATES... CAPTAIN CARPENTRY VS JAMES MAY IC TITLE. KOKDOWN ELIMINATION CHAMBER. SLENDERMAN VS RONALD MCDONALD! HOOK UP MY DAMN MIC SO I DON'T HAVE TO SCREAM!... *Ahem* That's better, now the award for best match is... Slenderman & Ronald McDonald in a Buried Alive match!"
Slender: "..."
I'll assume that Slenderman is thankful for the award, Ronald McDonald is still lying in the ground somewhere. Onwards, we go to Jeremy Kyle who is still trying to get opinions from fans... Nope, comms have gone down. Anyway, we go now to the stage as the award for Worst Match is being presented. Please welcome to the stage, from the Hoenn region... Alan & Ralph!
Ralph: "Greetings SWC, I'm still kinda getting used to sort-of celebrity status!"
Alan: "Shut yer cakehole & give the award so I can order my pint at the after party!"
Ralph: "OK, my foul-mouthed fellow. This "award" goes to... Niko Bellic vs Spider-Man!"
Alan: "Come & get it Spidey, or it goes on eBay!"
Well it was nice seeing Alan & Ralph, but we now move on to Lady Gaga performing her 2011 hit Poker Face!
Anywho, it's half eleven which means more awards to be awarded! Funniest moment to be presented by a well known comedian. Katy Brand.
Katy: "*INSERT SHIT JOKE HERE FOLLOWED BY A CRAP ACCENT*"
Present the award already you cow!
Katy: "Ugh... Metalgod!"
Metalfuck: "thx fags lol u suck the nuts!"
*The boos ring out*
Oh my, lets go live to Jeremy Kyle. Jeremy...
Jeremy: "Well, that backfired. Funniest moment, not funny at all. Anyway, I must be on stage alongside Neil Lennon to present the best superstar award."
He said it.
Neil: "I would like to take this opportunity to thank all of the SWC fans who sounded their appreciation for mine & Jeremy's hard work creating superstars & hope that you continue the support."
Jeremy: "I would also echo Mr Lennon's statement tonight, but time is against us. The award for best superstar goes to... George!"
George: "I knew I would win, I mean I'm amazingly dressed, talented & I of course saved the company! But yeah thanks, I won superstar of the year, of course I knew I would!"
Cor blimey, he loves himself! Worst superstar presented by oh, it's me!
Me: "Ladies & Gentlemen, we have at times shared joy, excitement, laughter, even at times our frustration, anger. But this award is the ultimate indignation, whoever gets this you may, feel free to laugh. The winner is... Darth Vader!"
*Vader too embarrassed to come up*
Me: "Come on Vader, try not to shit yourself, renting the hall cost ages!"
Turns out I'm presenting most of the awards, well the next one at least.
Me: "I'm keeping this one quick. Debut of the year... James May! May you continue your amazing career."
May: "Cheers lads!... And um, ladettes!"
Crap Impact of the year (even presented with a crap impact)
Here's a hobo of the street to chuck it at the winner... METALFUCK CATCH!
Here's George to present the award for best dressed, I'll assume he wins...
George: "Hell, you may as well give this one to me... The winner is... Stacey Lacey?!? SHE DOESN'T EVEN WEAR CLOTHES, WELL SHE RARELY DOES! THIS IS RIGGED!"
& of course, the worst dressed award, presented by Martin, the work experience lad, he is completely bad at fashion, even I'm better...
Martin: "Gee, this award goes to... Mumford!"
Mumford: "I NOT LIKE THIS AWARD, IT'S SMELLY & HORRIBLE, I WANTED A BETTER GOLD ONE SHAPED LIKE A HAT WOOOO!"
As long as he doesn't wear it...
We bring you now, to the final award. The "Unbelievable, Jeff! Award for most shocking, presented by Jeff Stelling & Kris Kamara..."
Jeff: "There has been a decision... Who has it gone to Kammy?"
Kamara: "UNBELIEVABLE JEFF! It... Hasn't been decided yet! No wait it has Jeff it's... Ronald McDonald's heel turn! UNBELIEVABLE JEFF!"
Jeff: "Typical Kammy, feeling jovial under pressure. That concludes SWC Award ceremony. Thanks for watching, happy new year."
It's nearly 2013, infact 8 minutes. We'll just run a generic slideshow of the past year. This will conclude SWC for tonight & infact the year, see you in 2013!
*highlight reel & all involved with SWC on the stage applauding. Backstage, office workers, event security & of course the superstars all receiving their rounds of applause (except Metalfuck)*
5 minutes to go. We are not wasting a once in a lifetime shot of all of SWC on the stage at midnight. Speaking of which, I better get up there!
OMG 30 SECONDS!
WE'RE IN 2013~! THE PERFECT GROUP SHOT OF ALL OF SWC ON THE STAGE! Right, back to work then?
