Post by Elder Gohan on Mar 8, 2013 15:39:16 GMT -5
Ed beat Borat in the opening match.
Me: "May I have your attention please. An SWC superstar is currently being punished for a recent outburst, the details shall remain private until they have been confirmed. I have been authorised to administer the punishment myself & I shall go public with it. Justin Bieber, would you please come to the ring."
*Bieber comes out*
Bieber: "I didn't do it, I swear!"
*Through a text, confirmation of the incident*
Me: "Mr Bieber, I have it on good authority that you assaulted a fan in London. Whether it was verbal or physical remains unclear, however under NO circumstances are you allowed to intimidate fans, consider this your last warning, we at SWC operate a ZERO TOLERANCE policy on assault regarding fans."
Bieber: "But what about George?"
Me: "Do not change the subject. You must learn that actions have consequences, George on the other hand is well behaved at fan zones & signings, he doesn't attack fans or call them names. The point is, the people pay your wage here, there's no legion of screaming 4-12 year old psycho girls, who are intent on making shit music better than deserving artists. You know what I myself may face disciplinary for this, but you are a pain in the arse to work with, backstage & onstage. Get out of the ring & out of my sight maggot!"
George beat Homer Simpson in 4 minutes.
George: "That was easy, beating tubbs over there. Look at him, white shirt & jeans? He's been wearing that since 1990 for fuck's sake! But maybe I'm being hasty... I am after all in the Wank Bank match alongside Mumford & Trevor Rent. So I can safely say I am the best dressed already!"
Mumford pinned Rey & then started a GREEN ARMY chant.
Jake Jolson pinned Ronald McDonald in an amazing upset, Little Britain came to rescue McDonald.
Captain Carpentry vs Neil Dimmick for a spot in the wank bank match next.
Dimmick is taking a beating here, will he upset the captain tonight? Hey wait, that's George! What's he doing here, it looks like he's brought a bottle of Joop Homme! Is he gonna make the arena smell nice, Dimmick is down. Captain Carpentry walks over to George & George sprays it into the captain's eyes... DE-CORER BY DIMMICK! 1....2.....3! NEIL DIMMICK HAS PINNED THE CAPTAIN! He's going to Fluck-The-Cluckamania! George knew that Neil Dimmick isn't gonna win, so he got rid of the bigger threat. Captain Carpentry.
Dimmick: *In a scouse accent* "EY! I've only gone un done ih eh lad? Ahm gowing to da fluck-a-cluckamania laddeh! Maybe walk ou' werld champ!"
Me: "May I have your attention please. An SWC superstar is currently being punished for a recent outburst, the details shall remain private until they have been confirmed. I have been authorised to administer the punishment myself & I shall go public with it. Justin Bieber, would you please come to the ring."
*Bieber comes out*
Bieber: "I didn't do it, I swear!"
*Through a text, confirmation of the incident*
Me: "Mr Bieber, I have it on good authority that you assaulted a fan in London. Whether it was verbal or physical remains unclear, however under NO circumstances are you allowed to intimidate fans, consider this your last warning, we at SWC operate a ZERO TOLERANCE policy on assault regarding fans."
Bieber: "But what about George?"
Me: "Do not change the subject. You must learn that actions have consequences, George on the other hand is well behaved at fan zones & signings, he doesn't attack fans or call them names. The point is, the people pay your wage here, there's no legion of screaming 4-12 year old psycho girls, who are intent on making shit music better than deserving artists. You know what I myself may face disciplinary for this, but you are a pain in the arse to work with, backstage & onstage. Get out of the ring & out of my sight maggot!"
George beat Homer Simpson in 4 minutes.
George: "That was easy, beating tubbs over there. Look at him, white shirt & jeans? He's been wearing that since 1990 for fuck's sake! But maybe I'm being hasty... I am after all in the Wank Bank match alongside Mumford & Trevor Rent. So I can safely say I am the best dressed already!"
Mumford pinned Rey & then started a GREEN ARMY chant.
Jake Jolson pinned Ronald McDonald in an amazing upset, Little Britain came to rescue McDonald.
Captain Carpentry vs Neil Dimmick for a spot in the wank bank match next.
Dimmick is taking a beating here, will he upset the captain tonight? Hey wait, that's George! What's he doing here, it looks like he's brought a bottle of Joop Homme! Is he gonna make the arena smell nice, Dimmick is down. Captain Carpentry walks over to George & George sprays it into the captain's eyes... DE-CORER BY DIMMICK! 1....2.....3! NEIL DIMMICK HAS PINNED THE CAPTAIN! He's going to Fluck-The-Cluckamania! George knew that Neil Dimmick isn't gonna win, so he got rid of the bigger threat. Captain Carpentry.
Dimmick: *In a scouse accent* "EY! I've only gone un done ih eh lad? Ahm gowing to da fluck-a-cluckamania laddeh! Maybe walk ou' werld champ!"
