Post by Elder Gohan on Jan 11, 2013 8:33:27 GMT -5
Match 1: James May successfully retains the IC Title against Luigi
SWC Title match: Slenderman vs Snape (NO MAGIC)
Who will walk out of this match as champion? Snape counters the lock up with a swift blow to the head, Slender walks up to Snape intimidating him. What sort of lifeform is Slenderman? anyway Slenderman never usually wrestles, but he's gonna have to come-up with something special, oh the lights have gone? Now Snape has gone as well? Wha? How will it effect the match? Snape reappeared! That counts as a use of magic! Ref, are you blind?!? The match resumes, as Slenderman beating the hell out of Snape, now that's an illegal choke, no not even a choke, Slender is strangling Snape! The ref isn't doing anything! 10 minutes later the match is still going on & the ref is STILL useless. Slender with a CHOKESLAM! 1.2.3! Slenderman retains in a really unfair match...
SWC World Heavyweight Title Heck in a Ceck match: Lou vs Andrew Pipkin.
No love lost between these two former teammates, but more about the Heck in a Ceck match. Health & Safety have deemed a Hell in a Cell too dangerous & violent, so we've had to replace it with the Heck in a Ceck, the Cell is now a giant see-through Tupperware box instead of steel. Oh the match? They're just brawling, Lou has abandoned his style of wrestling to beat up Andrew, Lou has just thrown his former friend into the exposed turnbuckle Lou sets up a splash & Andrew ducks under leaving Lou exposed up there, Andrew forages under the ring & finds a chair under the ring & clatters Lou with it, Lou wobbling on his feet, Andy goes for another hit & hits himself accidentally! Lou is beating the hell out of Andrew, now dragging him into the outside of the ring, both men have now scaled the Tupperware box... This is now just a fight, Lou almost pushing Andrew off the cell but stops himself Andrew ducks a clothesline... HOLY SHIT WHAT A SPEAR OFF THE CECK BY ANDREW PIPKIN~! Through the announce table! Andrew has landed about arms reach... 1...2...3! NEW WORLD CHAMPION! ANDREW PIPKIN DEFEATED HIS FORMER FRIEND LOU IN THE HECK IN A CECK MATCH! DOES THIS MEAN THAT LITTLE BRITAIN ARE DONE FOR GOOD?!?
Ladies & Gentlemen, Boys & Morons... It is now time for... THE ROYAL BUMBLE MATCH! Introducing, the poor sod who drew NUMBER 1...
It's Edd! Unlucky! And the 2nd is...
James Bond! Poor soul, he really got a bum deal. He's locked Edd in the sharpshooter! Edd is tapping but there is nothing he can do, he has to go over the top rope to be eliminated! Entering #3...
It's Ed! Will he save Edd? Yes he will, it's a 2 on 1 in favour of the Ed's, how will they manage to defeat Bond? it looks like Edd is directing a beatdown, Edd now has a submission hold locked in on James Bond, as that all important timer ticks down... #4
It's our first surprise! EXEGGUTOR! He's a pokemon! Will he shake dem coconuts? He headbutts Ed, then Edd now he's squashed 007, Exeggutor is fired up! Then Edd hits him from behind as Ed & Edd double team Exeggutor... ELIMINATED! The clock is ticking... Who is #5? It is...
Oh it's only Shrek, does he still work here? Oh well he stares down Ed & eventually come to blows, as James Bond helps Shrek beatdown Ed, that's vlever as he now knows that Shrek will be hard to eliminate... Not quite, Ed hangs on. That clock is ticking, #6 is...
Snape... Who immediately targets Edd who hasn't really done much, the Ed's dominance of the Bumble is fading, Shrek & Bond still teaming up against Ed leaving Snape alone with Edd! Snape is walking slowly towards Edd... Low Blow to Snape... #7 is about to appear...
Neil Dimmick! His silly apple song! He goes straight for Ed! Helping Shrek & Bond, Ed levering against the ropes... Oh Dimmick has eliminated Ed! Everyone in the ring now turns their attention to Edd, who is shaking with fear... Dimmick lifts up Double D to his feet... Bond strikes Dimmick & now everyone is arguing & fighting! Edd leaves the ring under the bottom rope... #8...
Last years Bumble winner Paul Chuckle! He sees Edd trying to hide & throws him in the ring... Just to eliminate Edd! All that for nothing Edd, what a waste! Dimmick is on fire, he's striking everyone & chucks Snape out of the match! It's not Snape's night. James Bond locks a Sharpshooter on Paul Chuckle! #9...
Osama bin Laden! He enters the ring, and immediately cuts a 3 minute promo about not getting justice etc. as #10 comes out...
It's Mumford! His going mad, it's his first Bumble. But he looks like he wants to ride his bike instead, he's in the ring, he goes straight for Dimmick, putting him in a boston crab. Everyone is still wearing eachother down, Osama locks Paul Chuckle in a camel clutch! #11 is on his way...
A huge cheer as Louis Spence makes his way to the ring! He goes for Shrek, rekindling a rivalry. Well, not really a rivalry considering Shrek has never beaten Spence... Spence with a stiff kick to Osama & ducks Shrek's clothesline, Shrek leaning dangerously over the top rope... He hangs on, Dimmick nearly eliminating Mumford... oop #12 is...
A heavily beaten Lou makes his way into the Bumble, having lost the title earlier, what a turnout it'd be if Lou wins the whole thing, we're already at #12 & only 4 eliminations! STOP PISSING AROUND EVERYONE. Whoa, Dimmick almost gone there... Mumford dropkicking Paul Chuckle into the corner... Unlucky #13 is...
Little dick Justin Bieber, he sings! Everyone is ignoring him or booing, Bieber is finally in the ring, everyone stops & turns their attention to Bieber... Bieber smiles... Everyone beats him up! And... Bieber's gone, Shrek & Louis Spence now start fighting again, if Shrek eliminates Spence does that technically count as a win? #14 is...
AUSTIN POWERS! GROOVY BABY! HE'S HERE IN THE BUMBLE WILL HE WIN THE WHOLE THING? Let's see. He goes for Mumford, Dimmick & then Paul Chuckle... Paul Chuckle loses balance & falls over the top rope! Austin Powers makes an elimination, can he outlast the match? Halfway through the match as #15 is...
Gabriel Logan is in the Bumble, every secret agent known to man is here in the SWC arena, this can't be good for the safety of the world & Shrek just got eliminated! By Louis Spence! I wonder who will win this thing, Austin Powers over the top rope & is thrown out by Mumford! #16 come out to play!
Gun Jack is here, he looks more destructive than ever, as he makes short work of Osama bin Laden... I feel sorry for whoever has to come out next, James Bond attempts to take down Jack, Mumford flies onto Jack, but Jack catches Mumford & powerslam, ooft I felt that! #17, meet your doom!
#17 is George! He's taking his time soaking up the boo's, he's in no rush. George makes it into the ring & eliminates Lou straight away. Gun Jack is leaning toward the announce table... James Bond runs up & gets thrown into the announce table with one hand! That's one hell of an elimination... Dimmick has lasted quite long now, he has now been in the ring the longest. #18 is gonna come out, Gun Jack has now been seated in the corner...
Oh please, really. A 90 year old Mae Young? In the Bumble? We can't have a hell in a cell match, but we can allow a 90 year old to wrestle 2 secret agents & a homicidal robot?!? GO ON, BRONCO BUSTER TO GUN JACK! You've done it now, big mistake... Gun Jack has that look... Mae Young lifted up... eliminated... Well, that was the joke entrant. #19 is (please be a wrestler...)
Is it really Jeremy Kyle? He looks stupid in wrestling gear... Gun Jack is distracted... Dropkick by Kyle & Jack falls over the top rope! SHOCK OF THE BUMBLE! JEREMY KYLE ELIMINATES GUN JACK! Louis Spence, almost gone! But hangs on. Ladies & Gentlemen, what have we just seen! I repeat JEREMY KYLE ELIMINATES GUN JACK! #20 is on his way...
Niko Bellic makes his way to the ring, he's in & beats down James Bond, who I completely forgot about & is thrown out of the ring by Bellic, Jeremy Kyle confronts Bellic & throws a cheap shot to Bellic & dropkicks Bellic out of there! Jeremy Kyle is dominating the Bumble! 2 ELIMINATIONS! #21 is...
The current Intercontinental Champion, for 9 months... James May, how will he fare in the Bumble... He thinks for a second & targets Jeremy Kyle, it's pretty much stalemate in the ring at the moment, Dimmick eliminates Spence! Here we go # 22 is *BUZZER*
The crowd is silent...
IS IT? YES IT IS! RONALD MCDONALD HAS RETURNED TO SWC, HE'S BACK FROM THE DEAD~! JUST LISTEN TO THIS CROWD! THEY HAVE ERUPTED! RONALD THROWING LEFTS & RIGHTS, ELIMINATING JAMES MAY! THERE GOES GABE LOGAN! OH RONALD MCDONALD IS CLEANING HOUSE! #23 is...
It's crazy Jake Jolson! In the Bumble beating Ronald McDonald down & then goes to eliminate George & does! Jake Jolson goes for Ronald McDonald! It's a fight, not at all safe SWC... #24 get out here now!
Oh, Yoshimitsu. Only lasted 7 seconds... What a waste... Ohh Mumford is gone, Ronald McDonald starting to find that momentum again, Oh & Jolson stops it dead. Jeremy Kyle is... Really, you're camping in the Bumble? #25 is on the way...
Trevor Rent has a real chance to win this, he's decided to form an alliance & they double team Dimmick, who counter the second double team & contemplates his next move... Ronald McDonald is STILL brawling with Jake Jolson. #26 is arriving...
The Stig enters running & helps out Dimmick against Trevor Rent & Jeremy Kyle. more wrestling no eliminating, chop chop! Eventually The Stig eliminates Trevor Rent. Everyone thinks about what they're gonna do next... # 27 is
Spider-Man! He tries to team up with Dimmick & The Stig, but they wont have it! He's eliminated by Jeremy Kyle! Kyle is on fire tonight! Jeremy Kyle, ambushed by The Stig, the ambush backfired & The Stig is gone... #28 step up to the ring...
IT'S CAPTAIN CARPENTRY! He goes straight for Jeremy Kyle, but changes his mind & eliminates Jake Jolson! Captain Carpentry & Ronald McDonald all fired up, Dimmick is gone now. It was a brave effort from Neil Dimmick... #29 is here...
Borat is here! He goes to shake the Captain's hand & REBATE POWERBOMB to the outside... He lasted 20 seconds! What a waste! Only Jeremy Kyle, Ronald McDonald & Captain Carpentry remain as the final superstar makes his entrance...
Barry Chuckle can win the Bumble, just like his brother the year before! He looks at Captain Carpentry & eliminates him with a clothesline, sacrificing himself in the process!
WE ARE DOWN TO THE FINAL TWO, RONALD MCDONALD & JEREMY KYLE, Ronald is taken down by a dropkick. Jeremy Kyle is shocked that he could go to Fluck-The-Cluckamania 2! Jeremy, picks up Ronald McDonald... Goes to throw him over the top rope... MCDONALD COUNTERS & JEREMY KYLE IS ELIMINATED! RONALD MCDONALD RETURNED & WINS THE BUMBLE!
SWC Title match: Slenderman vs Snape (NO MAGIC)
Who will walk out of this match as champion? Snape counters the lock up with a swift blow to the head, Slender walks up to Snape intimidating him. What sort of lifeform is Slenderman? anyway Slenderman never usually wrestles, but he's gonna have to come-up with something special, oh the lights have gone? Now Snape has gone as well? Wha? How will it effect the match? Snape reappeared! That counts as a use of magic! Ref, are you blind?!? The match resumes, as Slenderman beating the hell out of Snape, now that's an illegal choke, no not even a choke, Slender is strangling Snape! The ref isn't doing anything! 10 minutes later the match is still going on & the ref is STILL useless. Slender with a CHOKESLAM! 1.2.3! Slenderman retains in a really unfair match...
SWC World Heavyweight Title Heck in a Ceck match: Lou vs Andrew Pipkin.
No love lost between these two former teammates, but more about the Heck in a Ceck match. Health & Safety have deemed a Hell in a Cell too dangerous & violent, so we've had to replace it with the Heck in a Ceck, the Cell is now a giant see-through Tupperware box instead of steel. Oh the match? They're just brawling, Lou has abandoned his style of wrestling to beat up Andrew, Lou has just thrown his former friend into the exposed turnbuckle Lou sets up a splash & Andrew ducks under leaving Lou exposed up there, Andrew forages under the ring & finds a chair under the ring & clatters Lou with it, Lou wobbling on his feet, Andy goes for another hit & hits himself accidentally! Lou is beating the hell out of Andrew, now dragging him into the outside of the ring, both men have now scaled the Tupperware box... This is now just a fight, Lou almost pushing Andrew off the cell but stops himself Andrew ducks a clothesline... HOLY SHIT WHAT A SPEAR OFF THE CECK BY ANDREW PIPKIN~! Through the announce table! Andrew has landed about arms reach... 1...2...3! NEW WORLD CHAMPION! ANDREW PIPKIN DEFEATED HIS FORMER FRIEND LOU IN THE HECK IN A CECK MATCH! DOES THIS MEAN THAT LITTLE BRITAIN ARE DONE FOR GOOD?!?
Ladies & Gentlemen, Boys & Morons... It is now time for... THE ROYAL BUMBLE MATCH! Introducing, the poor sod who drew NUMBER 1...
It's Edd! Unlucky! And the 2nd is...
James Bond! Poor soul, he really got a bum deal. He's locked Edd in the sharpshooter! Edd is tapping but there is nothing he can do, he has to go over the top rope to be eliminated! Entering #3...
It's Ed! Will he save Edd? Yes he will, it's a 2 on 1 in favour of the Ed's, how will they manage to defeat Bond? it looks like Edd is directing a beatdown, Edd now has a submission hold locked in on James Bond, as that all important timer ticks down... #4
It's our first surprise! EXEGGUTOR! He's a pokemon! Will he shake dem coconuts? He headbutts Ed, then Edd now he's squashed 007, Exeggutor is fired up! Then Edd hits him from behind as Ed & Edd double team Exeggutor... ELIMINATED! The clock is ticking... Who is #5? It is...
Oh it's only Shrek, does he still work here? Oh well he stares down Ed & eventually come to blows, as James Bond helps Shrek beatdown Ed, that's vlever as he now knows that Shrek will be hard to eliminate... Not quite, Ed hangs on. That clock is ticking, #6 is...
Snape... Who immediately targets Edd who hasn't really done much, the Ed's dominance of the Bumble is fading, Shrek & Bond still teaming up against Ed leaving Snape alone with Edd! Snape is walking slowly towards Edd... Low Blow to Snape... #7 is about to appear...
Neil Dimmick! His silly apple song! He goes straight for Ed! Helping Shrek & Bond, Ed levering against the ropes... Oh Dimmick has eliminated Ed! Everyone in the ring now turns their attention to Edd, who is shaking with fear... Dimmick lifts up Double D to his feet... Bond strikes Dimmick & now everyone is arguing & fighting! Edd leaves the ring under the bottom rope... #8...
Last years Bumble winner Paul Chuckle! He sees Edd trying to hide & throws him in the ring... Just to eliminate Edd! All that for nothing Edd, what a waste! Dimmick is on fire, he's striking everyone & chucks Snape out of the match! It's not Snape's night. James Bond locks a Sharpshooter on Paul Chuckle! #9...
Osama bin Laden! He enters the ring, and immediately cuts a 3 minute promo about not getting justice etc. as #10 comes out...
It's Mumford! His going mad, it's his first Bumble. But he looks like he wants to ride his bike instead, he's in the ring, he goes straight for Dimmick, putting him in a boston crab. Everyone is still wearing eachother down, Osama locks Paul Chuckle in a camel clutch! #11 is on his way...
A huge cheer as Louis Spence makes his way to the ring! He goes for Shrek, rekindling a rivalry. Well, not really a rivalry considering Shrek has never beaten Spence... Spence with a stiff kick to Osama & ducks Shrek's clothesline, Shrek leaning dangerously over the top rope... He hangs on, Dimmick nearly eliminating Mumford... oop #12 is...
A heavily beaten Lou makes his way into the Bumble, having lost the title earlier, what a turnout it'd be if Lou wins the whole thing, we're already at #12 & only 4 eliminations! STOP PISSING AROUND EVERYONE. Whoa, Dimmick almost gone there... Mumford dropkicking Paul Chuckle into the corner... Unlucky #13 is...
Little dick Justin Bieber, he sings! Everyone is ignoring him or booing, Bieber is finally in the ring, everyone stops & turns their attention to Bieber... Bieber smiles... Everyone beats him up! And... Bieber's gone, Shrek & Louis Spence now start fighting again, if Shrek eliminates Spence does that technically count as a win? #14 is...
AUSTIN POWERS! GROOVY BABY! HE'S HERE IN THE BUMBLE WILL HE WIN THE WHOLE THING? Let's see. He goes for Mumford, Dimmick & then Paul Chuckle... Paul Chuckle loses balance & falls over the top rope! Austin Powers makes an elimination, can he outlast the match? Halfway through the match as #15 is...
Gabriel Logan is in the Bumble, every secret agent known to man is here in the SWC arena, this can't be good for the safety of the world & Shrek just got eliminated! By Louis Spence! I wonder who will win this thing, Austin Powers over the top rope & is thrown out by Mumford! #16 come out to play!
Gun Jack is here, he looks more destructive than ever, as he makes short work of Osama bin Laden... I feel sorry for whoever has to come out next, James Bond attempts to take down Jack, Mumford flies onto Jack, but Jack catches Mumford & powerslam, ooft I felt that! #17, meet your doom!
#17 is George! He's taking his time soaking up the boo's, he's in no rush. George makes it into the ring & eliminates Lou straight away. Gun Jack is leaning toward the announce table... James Bond runs up & gets thrown into the announce table with one hand! That's one hell of an elimination... Dimmick has lasted quite long now, he has now been in the ring the longest. #18 is gonna come out, Gun Jack has now been seated in the corner...
Oh please, really. A 90 year old Mae Young? In the Bumble? We can't have a hell in a cell match, but we can allow a 90 year old to wrestle 2 secret agents & a homicidal robot?!? GO ON, BRONCO BUSTER TO GUN JACK! You've done it now, big mistake... Gun Jack has that look... Mae Young lifted up... eliminated... Well, that was the joke entrant. #19 is (please be a wrestler...)
Is it really Jeremy Kyle? He looks stupid in wrestling gear... Gun Jack is distracted... Dropkick by Kyle & Jack falls over the top rope! SHOCK OF THE BUMBLE! JEREMY KYLE ELIMINATES GUN JACK! Louis Spence, almost gone! But hangs on. Ladies & Gentlemen, what have we just seen! I repeat JEREMY KYLE ELIMINATES GUN JACK! #20 is on his way...
Niko Bellic makes his way to the ring, he's in & beats down James Bond, who I completely forgot about & is thrown out of the ring by Bellic, Jeremy Kyle confronts Bellic & throws a cheap shot to Bellic & dropkicks Bellic out of there! Jeremy Kyle is dominating the Bumble! 2 ELIMINATIONS! #21 is...
The current Intercontinental Champion, for 9 months... James May, how will he fare in the Bumble... He thinks for a second & targets Jeremy Kyle, it's pretty much stalemate in the ring at the moment, Dimmick eliminates Spence! Here we go # 22 is *BUZZER*
The crowd is silent...
IS IT? YES IT IS! RONALD MCDONALD HAS RETURNED TO SWC, HE'S BACK FROM THE DEAD~! JUST LISTEN TO THIS CROWD! THEY HAVE ERUPTED! RONALD THROWING LEFTS & RIGHTS, ELIMINATING JAMES MAY! THERE GOES GABE LOGAN! OH RONALD MCDONALD IS CLEANING HOUSE! #23 is...
It's crazy Jake Jolson! In the Bumble beating Ronald McDonald down & then goes to eliminate George & does! Jake Jolson goes for Ronald McDonald! It's a fight, not at all safe SWC... #24 get out here now!
Oh, Yoshimitsu. Only lasted 7 seconds... What a waste... Ohh Mumford is gone, Ronald McDonald starting to find that momentum again, Oh & Jolson stops it dead. Jeremy Kyle is... Really, you're camping in the Bumble? #25 is on the way...
Trevor Rent has a real chance to win this, he's decided to form an alliance & they double team Dimmick, who counter the second double team & contemplates his next move... Ronald McDonald is STILL brawling with Jake Jolson. #26 is arriving...
The Stig enters running & helps out Dimmick against Trevor Rent & Jeremy Kyle. more wrestling no eliminating, chop chop! Eventually The Stig eliminates Trevor Rent. Everyone thinks about what they're gonna do next... # 27 is
Spider-Man! He tries to team up with Dimmick & The Stig, but they wont have it! He's eliminated by Jeremy Kyle! Kyle is on fire tonight! Jeremy Kyle, ambushed by The Stig, the ambush backfired & The Stig is gone... #28 step up to the ring...
IT'S CAPTAIN CARPENTRY! He goes straight for Jeremy Kyle, but changes his mind & eliminates Jake Jolson! Captain Carpentry & Ronald McDonald all fired up, Dimmick is gone now. It was a brave effort from Neil Dimmick... #29 is here...
Borat is here! He goes to shake the Captain's hand & REBATE POWERBOMB to the outside... He lasted 20 seconds! What a waste! Only Jeremy Kyle, Ronald McDonald & Captain Carpentry remain as the final superstar makes his entrance...
Barry Chuckle can win the Bumble, just like his brother the year before! He looks at Captain Carpentry & eliminates him with a clothesline, sacrificing himself in the process!
WE ARE DOWN TO THE FINAL TWO, RONALD MCDONALD & JEREMY KYLE, Ronald is taken down by a dropkick. Jeremy Kyle is shocked that he could go to Fluck-The-Cluckamania 2! Jeremy, picks up Ronald McDonald... Goes to throw him over the top rope... MCDONALD COUNTERS & JEREMY KYLE IS ELIMINATED! RONALD MCDONALD RETURNED & WINS THE BUMBLE!
