Post by Elder Gohan on Aug 21, 2013 6:54:42 GMT -5
"Welcome to SWC: Reality, I am tonight's host Ed, on tonight's show: SWC NextGen 2, Brian the confused.com robot gets executed for being annoying & Mumford has a surprise for Stacey Lacey!"
*SWC Did you buy this?*
Gyles Brandreth: "Hello viewers! It is I, Gyles Brandreth! Unfortunately no one admitted to purchasing the Chris Jericho figure, but none the less we have a more embarrassing piece of merchandise! We have a range of SWC bedspreads! Featuring Captain Carpentry, Mumford, George & Rey! These didn't sell at all well, as no one wants to pretend to go to bed with the aforementioned superstars, they'd rather the real thing god damnit! Why am I stuck doing segments such as this? Oh blast it!
Gyles Brandreth has had a meltdown live on TV. We're sorry.
*The Execution of Brian.*
Brian the confused.com robot, you are hereby found guilty of being a shit advert & annoying everyone. I sentence you to death!
Brian: "Oh no. Bye bye!"
I proceed to kick the shit out of Brian the robot, using a hammer.
*SWC NextGen 2*
Right I suppose we better get this over with... Right, introduce yourselves. Start with you, the pornstar.
Hank: "Hey I'm Hank Nutz, I'm a pornstar & pro wrestler, have been in small feds but none as big as SWC. I also love tight pussy."
Well put. Right, you the loony doctor, go.
Dr Demented: "I am Dr Demented, I am a doctor. My name is just unfortunate, my full name is Dr Peter Demented. I only signed up to prove that I am indeed sane, I love to care for people & wanted a career change."
That was unexpected o-0
Right you, robotty thingybob.
Wrestle-Tron 3000: "I. AM THE GREATEST. WRESTLING ROBOT. I AM INCAPABLE OF ERROR. I WAS MANUFACTURED TO BE THE BEST. WRESTLER EVER. HUMAN OPPONENTS WILL FEAR ME. BEEP BEEP."
Running on Amstrad technology I don't think so...
What a shit group so far, was Neil Lennon pissed when he was scouting these?
Phenis: "Umm ya... I am Phenis! I'm also a pornstar, I'm better than everyone here. I mean a smoking monkey?!? An ancient ass robot?!? I am superior! Vote Phenis!"
...
Johnny the chain smoking monkey: *Makes monkey noises & smokes*
Probably the best introduction so far...
John Clemmon: "I have been wrestling in promotions since the age of 16, I am now 76! I wrestled my first match in 1953! 60 years later, I'm still going! The guy I beat sadly passed away last year... But SWC is a new challenge to me, I'll show these kids what a real superstar is... Injuries? What are those? None of these upstarts no what one is, I had to wrestle with a broken leg for at least 20 minutes, crawl on my arms to the back & then see a doctor! Not none of this EMT business..."
Finally a guy I like!
Charmander: *CHAR!*
Awesome a Charmander!
Ronnie O'Sullivan: "I am the greatest snooker player of all time, do you know how I'm gonna introduce myself? Watch."
Oh he's rammed his snooker cue up Phenis' arse!
*Mumford's surprise*
Mumford: "AH YUMMY CHEESE SANDWICHES! I'M FULL, WHERE IS STACEY?"
Stacey: "I'm here babe."
Mumford: "I GOT A SURPRISE FOR YOU, LET ME JUST GET IT!"
Stacey: "OK hun."
Mumford: "OK I GOT IT, NO PEEKING! CLOSE YOUR EYES... STACEY, WILL YOU MARRY ME?!?"
*Pause...*
Stacey: "Yes Mumfie! I will!"
Mumford's gonna get married to the KOKDown! GM!
Mumford: "OH GOODY WAIT TILL I TELL DENNIS & MUMMY & DADDY & EVERYONE! WAIT, MY WILLY'S TURNING INTO STONE AGAIN!"
Stacey: "I'll take care of it"
In comes QB
QB: "Oh my god who cares about Mumford getting married? No one likes him anyway..."
Stacey: "Piss off. I love him."
Mumford: "MY WILLY'S TURNED INTO JELLY"
QB: "Haha, Mumford's been put off."
Here's... Rey? And he's hit QB with 2 snooker balls in a sock!
Rey: no 1 bullies momfort bt me lol momfort my bich bt grats on gtting married lol
Mumford is confused
SWC NextGen is gonna be disappointing...
*SWC Did you buy this?*
Gyles Brandreth: "Hello viewers! It is I, Gyles Brandreth! Unfortunately no one admitted to purchasing the Chris Jericho figure, but none the less we have a more embarrassing piece of merchandise! We have a range of SWC bedspreads! Featuring Captain Carpentry, Mumford, George & Rey! These didn't sell at all well, as no one wants to pretend to go to bed with the aforementioned superstars, they'd rather the real thing god damnit! Why am I stuck doing segments such as this? Oh blast it!
Gyles Brandreth has had a meltdown live on TV. We're sorry.
*The Execution of Brian.*
Brian the confused.com robot, you are hereby found guilty of being a shit advert & annoying everyone. I sentence you to death!
Brian: "Oh no. Bye bye!"
I proceed to kick the shit out of Brian the robot, using a hammer.
*SWC NextGen 2*
Right I suppose we better get this over with... Right, introduce yourselves. Start with you, the pornstar.
Hank: "Hey I'm Hank Nutz, I'm a pornstar & pro wrestler, have been in small feds but none as big as SWC. I also love tight pussy."
Well put. Right, you the loony doctor, go.
Dr Demented: "I am Dr Demented, I am a doctor. My name is just unfortunate, my full name is Dr Peter Demented. I only signed up to prove that I am indeed sane, I love to care for people & wanted a career change."
That was unexpected o-0
Right you, robotty thingybob.
Wrestle-Tron 3000: "I. AM THE GREATEST. WRESTLING ROBOT. I AM INCAPABLE OF ERROR. I WAS MANUFACTURED TO BE THE BEST. WRESTLER EVER. HUMAN OPPONENTS WILL FEAR ME. BEEP BEEP."
Running on Amstrad technology I don't think so...
What a shit group so far, was Neil Lennon pissed when he was scouting these?
Phenis: "Umm ya... I am Phenis! I'm also a pornstar, I'm better than everyone here. I mean a smoking monkey?!? An ancient ass robot?!? I am superior! Vote Phenis!"
...
Johnny the chain smoking monkey: *Makes monkey noises & smokes*
Probably the best introduction so far...
John Clemmon: "I have been wrestling in promotions since the age of 16, I am now 76! I wrestled my first match in 1953! 60 years later, I'm still going! The guy I beat sadly passed away last year... But SWC is a new challenge to me, I'll show these kids what a real superstar is... Injuries? What are those? None of these upstarts no what one is, I had to wrestle with a broken leg for at least 20 minutes, crawl on my arms to the back & then see a doctor! Not none of this EMT business..."
Finally a guy I like!
Charmander: *CHAR!*
Awesome a Charmander!
Ronnie O'Sullivan: "I am the greatest snooker player of all time, do you know how I'm gonna introduce myself? Watch."
Oh he's rammed his snooker cue up Phenis' arse!
*Mumford's surprise*
Mumford: "AH YUMMY CHEESE SANDWICHES! I'M FULL, WHERE IS STACEY?"
Stacey: "I'm here babe."
Mumford: "I GOT A SURPRISE FOR YOU, LET ME JUST GET IT!"
Stacey: "OK hun."
Mumford: "OK I GOT IT, NO PEEKING! CLOSE YOUR EYES... STACEY, WILL YOU MARRY ME?!?"
*Pause...*
Stacey: "Yes Mumfie! I will!"
Mumford's gonna get married to the KOKDown! GM!
Mumford: "OH GOODY WAIT TILL I TELL DENNIS & MUMMY & DADDY & EVERYONE! WAIT, MY WILLY'S TURNING INTO STONE AGAIN!"
Stacey: "I'll take care of it"
In comes QB
QB: "Oh my god who cares about Mumford getting married? No one likes him anyway..."
Stacey: "Piss off. I love him."
Mumford: "MY WILLY'S TURNED INTO JELLY"
QB: "Haha, Mumford's been put off."
Here's... Rey? And he's hit QB with 2 snooker balls in a sock!
Rey: no 1 bullies momfort bt me lol momfort my bich bt grats on gtting married lol
Mumford is confused
SWC NextGen is gonna be disappointing...
